Do you feel the crushing weight of your high-pressure family’s expectations on your shoulders?
Do you work so hard, but sometimes wonder what it’s all for? And not sure when you can finally relax, because there always seems to be more to do?
Do you wonder when will it EVER be enough? When YOU will ever feel enough? Or just be seen and loved for who you really are? without needing strings attached?
If so, I’m glad our paths crossed.
I’ve been exactly where you are and my “Tame the Tiger” program was made just for you.
It’s a loving & intentional process to befriend your Inner Tiger (critic).
APPLY FOR THE PROGRAM HERE!
Questions or not sure if this would be right for you? Book an inquiry call HERE.
If you grew up with Tiger parents, an immigrant family, or other high-pressure backgrounds, you might have birthed an Inner Tiger of your own.
One that’s harsh, critical, negative, relentless, demanding, perfectionistic, and unforgiving. It may beat you up over your every word, move, or thought.
You may constantly feel crummy, anxious, depressed, on edge, worried, nervous, hopeless, scared, guilty, ashamed, panicked, overwhelmed, lost, confused, empty, or restless, like you’re doing something wrong or that something ABOUT you is wrong.
You may struggle with relationships, getting too close to or trusting others, or more importantly, trusting YOURSELF.
You haven’t ever been modeled a SAFE home of compassion, forgiveness, gentleness, celebration, radical acceptance, and unconditional love that is spacious and SUPPORTIVE of the natural messiness and mistakes of your humanity.
It doesn’t have to be this way. You CAN befriend your Tiger, let it motivate and hold you to high standards, but achieve all your dreams while feeling GOOD, not while feeling bad.
You CAN take the pieces your family passed onto you, AND honor yourself, your truth, and your health too.
How can your life change after you Tame your Tiger?
Imagine…
–Silencing your Tiger when it flares up, ushering it back into its cage, & moving yourself back to centered compassion.
–Generating your own happiness from within, regardless of external circumstances; not every day will be good, but you’ll be able to find something good in every day.
–Feeling at peace, a baseline joy & satisfaction, that everything in your life, exactly as is, is enough, AND you can move towards your goals & desires in a sustainable way, savoring every step of the journey.
—Feeling PROUD of who you are and all that you have, instead of focusing on what you don’t have (yet), punishing yourself or waiting until you have them in order to finally be happy.
—Dropping guilt & shame for not being the perfect daughter/son, separating out what is your responsibility vs. theirs, & create that balance of honoring them AND yourself too, where you give generously but don’t over-give, people-please or burn out
–Visiting relatives without drama; mean comments from ANYONE don’t affect you because you KNOW they are not true and merely reflect their own negative filters.
–Seeing & deeply KNOWING what a precious, unique, special person you are, in a new way or depth you have not before.
–Feeling safe to speak up in ANY situation & stand up for your needs & values, whether in career, relationships, home life, etc.
–Shaping your life into a way that suits YOU, rather than try to fit yourself in other people’s boxes.
–Honoring your natural energy cycles, working WITH them, rather than against them.
–Problem-solving & making decisions more easily, quickly & efficiently, because your energy isn’t used up beating up or second-guessing yourself.
–Barely thinking about past mistakes, regrets, or future worries, because you’re too busy actually living your most joyful and vibrant life.
…and more! (full list of benefits HERE)
TAME THE TIGER SYLLABUS:
Each session we will also focus on untangling a “Tiger Parent” phrase / saying / theme you may have heard or repeated to yourself! Such as…
-“Be a good girl / boy!”
-“Don’t cry!!”
-“Act your age!”
-“Respect your elders!”
-“Why not A+?!”
-“You sure no premed??”
-“No dating!! Why you not married yet?!”
Bonuses: PDF bundle of Dr. Toni’s best resources, All-Access pass to events, 1:1 follow-up integration session, therapeutic art “Success Sketch,” Tiger playlist, custom guided meditation, dance party, + more!
WHY THIS WORK MATTERS / ITS BIRTH STORY:
A misfit, black sheep, and target for bullies (overweight, nerdy, androgynous-expressing, and a neurodivergent HSP Highly Sensitive Person, ADHD & OCD), I always struggled with a sense of belonging and FINALLY found home within myself, after a 20-year healing journey.
After my rock bottom moment at age 26 while skydiving, I realized medicine wasn’t right for me; I had completely burned out trying to please my immigrant Asian Tiger Parent family.
I had always lived for others, not thinking I was worthy of taking up space or being loved, unless I Achieved enough milestones to finally be “good enough.” I eventually broke down.
In piecing myself back together, I learned how to discover my inner love, unconditional worth, and belonging, and create inner safety & security so I could just be me, knowing that I am ENOUGH. It made ALL the difference for my life, in every single area.
So now I empower, educate, and advocate for the oppressed and different, especially those from harsh or shaming upbringings. I help walk them home to see that they do and have ALWAYS belonged.
As an ex-gynecologist now family physician, cartoonist, nomad, sex educator, relationship coach & mental health advocate, I’ve expanded beyond all others’ boxes and carved my own unique authentic path that feels true to my soul’s fullest expression.
Life isn’t easy, but it has started to feel right and be full of joy and peace. In healing my own inner Tiger, I’ve improved the relationship with my parents and our entire generationally traumatized lineage as well.
I’m now here to spend the rest of my life guiding others back to their truth, through my art, writing, courses, or working directly together.
The truth that we ALL belong here, no matter what we do or don’t do. We have a unique shape & spot that only we can fill in this beautiful Universe. We don’t have to hide, twist, or change ourselves to be loved or “successful.” Your true self is ENOUGH. It always has been, and always will be.
Program Details:
LIVE Group Program (max 8 students; cohort starts May 28 for AAPI & Mental Health Month)
-Weekly lesson via PDF, audio or video
-Ten 60 minute live group sessions over 3 months (2 integration weeks)
-Unlimited 1:1 messaging support with reply within 48-72 business hours
-Private community group (Slack or Facebook)
-Portal of resources for in-between session integration (videos, workbooks, activities, readings)
Each live session structure: (with a suggested theme / Tiger Parent saying for exploration & processing)
-group grounding exercise
-authentic sharing (celebrations, wins)
-spot 1:1 hot-seat coaching and/or Q&A about the lessons
-closing summary + intention for next week
-new accountability buddy pairing
Tuition $888 (or $333/month)
Early Bird Discount until May 10: $666 (or $250/month)
Founder’s Five (1st 5 signups: BOOK HERE): $555
Partial scholarships & extended payment plans available for students & low-income countries. 1:1 sessions & self-paced course ($188) can be discussed to suit your needs. Book a consult call HERE to inquire.
Never experienced coaching before? I’m happy to gift you a 45-min sample session for an $8 coffee/boba at Ko-fi.com (book your session HERE).
FAQs:
When will the group session times be?
Likely Wednesday evenings EST, but we will check with students’ schedules to try to accommodate everyone. You do not have to attend every session. Recordings may be available upon group consent.
Is this program only for people who had Tiger Parents?
NO! This program is open to anyone who can relate to having an Inner Critic, which may have been birthed from personality tendencies or interactions with peers, media, or society in general. The lessons that involve healing relationships with parents may be applied to other difficult relationships.
Is there a refund policy?
Yes – if you are not finding the program beneficial, you may submit completed lesson work and receive a refund of the remaining weeks.
How much of a time commitment would this be?
About 1.5-2 hours/week (the lessons are estimated 60-90 minutes, and checking in your accountability buddy daily would be about 30 minutes total). The calls and additional bonus materials are optional. You are welcome to take what resonates and leave the rest.“Toni radiates love and light. Her incredible kindness, inspiration, compassion, and empathy make her an amazing mentor, coach, cheerleader, and confidante to have in your corner. With her guidance and unwavering support, you can unlock your fullest potential! Our sessions together always left me feeling safe, understood, and energized. During our session together, I experienced several “aha moments,” gaining newfound clarity on my next steps. Toni’s honesty, attentiveness, keen observations, and creative problem-solving offer invaluable insights, helping me see beyond challenges and discover endless possibilities. With newfound confidence, I took action and witnessed tangible results in less than a week! I can’t thank Toni enough for all her help!”
–T.C., Toronto, Canada
(government employee to entrepreneur)“As a coach, it’s really clear that Toni cares deeply about her clients. She approaches her work from a place of genuine concern, paying close attention to and holding space for her client’s story. I was really impressed by her attention to detail; her determination in helping brainstorm ideas went above and beyond the level of engagement I’ve seen from other coaches I’ve worked with. Rather than being told what to do, it felt like I had someone on my side who could help me untangle a challenging situation. Her compassion, thoughtfulness, and creativity all shine through.“
–K.Y., Taiwan
(engineer & writer)
“I’ve worked with Toni for 2 years now – this woman CHANGES LIVES!! She nomaded in town for only 2 months but left a lasting impact. She was the first person who helped me feel safe to be fully myself, which I had never experienced before in my 50+ years on this earth. Before that, I had always felt too much or not enough and felt so much shame about myself, my body, my desires, almost everything. Toni radiates such a warm, nurturing, tender energy that envelopes you and makes you feel so seen, known, empowered and safe. She is also scientific, grounded, and full of practical wisdom and advice. I can’t recommend her enough.”
-J.L., Colorado
(intuitive energy healer)
More past client testimonials HERE.
Questions? Want to feel out if this is a good fit for you? Or inquire about scholarships? Book a consult call with Dr. Toni HERE.
(Want to learn more about my work and missions? Check out my podcast “Accept THEN Achieve” and book “WHY YOU NO DOCTOR ANYMORE?! Honoring Your Family AND Yourself Too.”
