Summary: It’s so important to have a higher purpose, mission, and calling for whatever you want to do!
I just wanted to make a quick post about the Acceptsians community I built.
I didn’t know it at the time, but the community defined my “Why,” the why behind why I exist and yearn to do the things I feel called to do.
Having a mission and higher sense of purpose, a bigger reason than just yourself, to do anything, is so crucial!!
When I started blogging and created the name “LTNoM(a)D,” I was mostly just thinking of myself. This name/brand describes me–I’m a Nomad and a No MD.
It supported others to break free to live their own paths through sharing my story and experiences, but it was still only an indirect means of helping, and seemed more me-centric than others-centric.
Acceptsians is quite different — even though the name is hard to spell and explain (whoops another rookie mistake when creating a name!), it is fully about others, everyone’s journeys.
Being an “Acceptsian” (pronounced like “Exception”) means you are an Exception – you question and break free from the norms, rules, or cultural customs that don’t serve you and your best interests.
I always felt I had compromised my highest self by sticking to the extreme filial piety cultural custom. I didn’t believe I could become a successful cartoonist, so I chose to become a doctor.
I blindly followed what my family wanted me to do rather than stop to think for myself, because I trusted the fallacy that age = wisdom and they knew better than I did.
(It turns out others know what’s good for you, but only YOU know what’s best for you.)
I also thought if I just made others happy, then I would be happy as well.
This is partially true, since I love bringing joy to others, but when it directly clashed with my values and kept me from doing what I really wanted to do with my limited time and energy, it severely harmed my health and became unsustainable.
I also realized how toxic it was to have been instilled the value of Achievement and how I’m not worthy if I don’t keep achieving, getting good grades, making more money, etc.
There is a joke that the “A” in “Asian” stands for “Achievement” or “A+.” But it leads to excessive criticism and low self-worth when we mess up or fall short of being perfect, which, as humans, we are bound to do at some point.
I discovered that the key to true “success,” which is happiness, inner peace, and being kind and generous to others, is Acceptance and Love of our perfectly imperfect selves and others.
Hence the name Acceptsians was born. The “A” in “Asian” is for “Accept,” not for “Achieve.”
Achievements are still important, but if they are our driving factors in life, we will never feel like “enough” and will keep chasing the next goal post, and the next and the next.
The U.S. rat race even encourages this by flooding us with messages that we need bigger houses, better cars, better-brand-name stuff, etc etc.
It takes so much courage and wisdom to define what is “enough” for us. To unearth our true, authentic values and goals for what we want out of life. Everyone’s values are different, and they are to all be respected.
And to admit that ours are different from others’, so it’d be a waste of our precious time and life energy if we did things for others at the expense of ignoring our own needs.
This community stands for authenticity, inclusivity, love, respect and acceptance of all viewpoints and ways of living.
It speaks a lot of Asian cultural experiences, but is not limited to just Asians. It’s for anyone who has faced challenges from naysayers and toxic cultures, or who care about breaking such chains for themselves or for loved ones.
If you or anyone you know is suffering, please join our community! We are here for you!!
P.S. Since June 2021, I changed the whole site domains from “LTNoM(a)D” to “Dr. Tooni.” (LTNomad was just too confusing to explain (and “Acceptsians” too hard to spell! @.@))